This month has taken a toll on me with an extreme roller coaster ride. For the past five years or so I find myself in this deep thinking mode every autumn season. This year has been a great year. I’m about to finally finish undergrad in December, and the “real” world awaits me. Keeping up with the Jones has went to another level with social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Sarah just got engaged. Bobby just got a new job. Karen just started her new business. Tom and Briana just had a baby. Oh my God did you see that outfit so and so had on at the party? Like this, retweet that, and mentions over here. Social media is my thing. I love it but lately my relationship with social media has had me blue.
It wasn’t until I went over to my uncle’s house to see my new cousin, and he asked me “where’s your man at?” Huh? I found it so ironic for him to ask me that, because the last guy I brought home the men in my family didn’t care for him. In high school dating was deemed negative.
“Stay away from boys they are nothing but trouble!” My family would always worn me. Even when I was in college no one wanted me to date even though I was in a long term relationship. Now I’m one class away from having my degree, and now it’s time for me to start dating?!
I don’t think so. I find nothing wrong with going on dates and having fun. I totally don’t see anything wrong with it, but why is it so much pressure? I will admit six of my friends from college are all married, two with children. Even my ex had a child and got married less than a year after we broke up, and in that order.
I am happy for my friends and family who are blessed to have a relationship, a marriage, and family. I am not drinking the haterade. I’m happy for the success stories too that I always see. I am.
After my uncle asked me that, it made me stop and think; am I falling behind social norms? Is there something wrong with me? It took a toll on me for a second.
Then I realized I’m only 23 years old. I’m single with no children. I’m just finishing my bachelors. I haven’t started my career just yet, but everything will happen in it’s time. This is just the beginning of my adulthood. I refuse to rush into responsibilities just to be like everyone else. I have so many dreams and goals that I would like to accomplish before I have someone calling me their Mrs. and mommy.
I’m going to let the social norms roll off my back, and do my own thing. I am beautiful. I am intelligent. I am bless. I am successful. I am rich. I am QueenMeDiva.
The power of life is in the tongue, and I speak life into my destiny. In due season my fruits will harvest. This is only the beginning.